Day two 2:37pm

Today is actually a little bit better than yesterday. I still want to smoke desperately but I am out of the haze for the moment and my will power is in tact. I hid all the pipes and the bong.....however this morning i found a pipe in the living room cause my boyfriend is an asshole....not really but he knows better than to tempt me.

I have a star that I keep drawing on my hand to remind me that I care about quitting for good. It also reminds me of spirituality and keeps me thinking and thanking.

Yes I want to smoke...right now actually which is why I am writing. I am still not eating much, but I like that because I need to loose some weight anyway. I am starting a new grad school class, and procrastinating on the reading I need to do for class.

I pride myself on my ability to sleep and last night was bullshit. I started this clonix cleanse to help get my system cleaned up, and it made me sweat so much and have to go to the bathroom all night long, and I feel kinda sick today....weird. It's a month long process, hopefully I will feel different, and better when its over.

I am glad that I haven't given in yet, and I think that if I can get through this week, I might be OK for good. I am mostly worried that I will get drunk and smoke then...so that is why I am asking my boyfriend to hide the pipes from me really good so I just can't find them. We sell weed so it's going to be around...and this morning I could smell it really strong...it was a bad moment. It would be wise to stop but I don't have a paying job, and school is expensive...so you gotta do what you gotta do right?

now I am going to attempt to read for school and get through this day two!!